We All Have SuperPowers

[Writing Class Week 5. Our intro prompt is to respond to a picture shown in class.]

What is the greatest superpower in the world? I sure don’t know, I don’t have it. What I do posses, however, are a multitude of low grade to useless superpowers to get me though life.

  1. The ability to spin my pen repeatedly around my thumb, on either hand, without dropping it. This is a highly desired superpower, because eventually everyone around me will try to do it. I refer to this as the Faculty-Meeting-Boredom-Defier.
  2. Texting while driving the car and simultaneously supervising the fight in the back seat. Not recommended by M.A.D.D., D.A.D.D., G.R.A.D.D. – or pretty much any agency associated with driving, but it is a useful power on a daily basis. I’ll call this one my Toddler-Texter-Appeaser.
  3. Googling the answer to a computer question that my husband is too lazy to do himself. Let’s just call this TechoGoogaPhobia.
  4. The ability to spell kids names with spaghetti, whether as a meal or just an afternoon craft. We’ll call this one Pastalicious Prefixes.
  5. Finally, my most useless superpower is the flexibility to crawl under a bathroom stall to exit in case of emergency – like this evening before class when the door handle broke off in my hand in the women’s room on the MDC Wolfson Campus. While I considered McGyvering a tampon, ballpoint pen, and hand sanitizer to slide the door off the hinges, it didn’t think it would work. Instead, I employed the BendagermCrawl.
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